3rd Entry-Non verbal communication

How do you tell if a girl is attracted to you? Most girls will not tell you that they are attracted to you as they are simply too shy. Now, you are attracted to a girl who is your good friend. However, you are afraid that she may not reciprocate your feelings and it may ruin your friendship with her. So should you confess to her or not? In this case, you really have to pay attention her nonverbal cues.

#1: Oculesics: The Eye Contact
When a girl is attracted to you or she is interested in you, she will look at you, hold her glance for a few seconds longer than usual, then she will look away, and look back at you with a gentle smile.

#2: Proxemics: The space/distance

According to E.T Halls, individuals will subconsciously perceive a distance that is appropriate for different relationships. They also establish a comfortable distance for personal interaction and nonverbally define this as their personal space. When a girl is attracted to you, she will let you into her more intimate personal space.

#3: Kinesics: The Subconscious Mirroring

When a girl is attracted to you, she will subconsciously copy your body posture. This is because in our subconscious mind, we believed that like body is equivalent to like minded.

#4: Haptics: The Touch

When a girl is attracted to you, she will tend to give you a gentle touch during her conversation with you.


Guys, I hope that the few "clues" stated above will help you understand your "special one" more=D

2nd Entry-Misinterpretation

She is wearing a new dress today. She has been waiting for his compliments, but he never did. She was about to walk away and through the corner of her eye, she saw him sticking his tongue out as though he is saying, " You looked terrible in this dress!". Yes, he must have thought that I'm ugly and I looked horrible no matter what I wear, therefore he has never given me any compliments for looking gorgeous and he always put me down in front of all his friends. She felt hurt and glared at him, saying "Did you stick your tongue out?". Then she storms away... Actually, he has no intention of telling her she looked terrible in the dress. He sticked out his tongue, simply to lick the stamp.

We all perceive our surroundings, experiences and situations differently. Our perception of an issue comes through the process of selecting, organizing and interpreting information. Many times we give personal meaning to the communication we receive. This explains why the lady in the picture, perceived the guy's innocent act of sticking out his tongue as trying to criticize the dress that she wore, when he never has the intention.

Therefore, it is so important for us to attend to or select the information that we received correctly. When we are heavily influenced by our past experiences (he has never complimented her for being gorgeous and always put her down in front of his friends), psychological state and environment etc, it is unlikely for us to make an unbiased judgement. This is where we will start to misinterpret the message that the other party is trying to send across.

Thus, we all should learn to manage our perception. One effective way that we can manage our perception will be through communication.

1st Entry-Chicken-a-la-carte???

This is an award winning short film by Ferdinand Dimadura which talks about hunger and poverty brought about by Globalization. This short film is posted on Youtube which received more than 230,000 hits and more than 400 comments. Out of these 400 over comments, many commented that they were very touched by the video and they actually teared as they were watching it. Many even said that they will never waste food again.

This is very remarkable as this video is filmed in an impoverished area in Philippines, and most of the people who commented on the video are not even from Philippines. They have never experienced such poverty and hunger, and yet they were so moved by what they saw in this six minutes video that they would want to make a commitment or rather a change in their lives(not to waste food anymore). This confirms the belief of the social constructionist who holds the perspective that, "Most of what we know and believe about the world comes to us through communication rather than through direct experience". The communication here does not simply refer to face to face communication, it also refer to communication through telephone, mass media.etc.

If what we know comes only through a direct experience such as a face to face conversation, then our awareness of the world around us will be too limited. For many of us that has never experienced extreme poverty and hunger, we will never fully understand how horrible it is to have to eat from leftovers.

I believed that many of us must have heard or been told by someone that we should not waste food, but how many of us actually listened to that comment? If such comment to persuade us not to waste food carry enough impact, then there will not be incidents such as 6.7 million tonnes of food that is thrown away by households in UK each year. But look at these people featured in the video, though they are eating from leftovers, they were still so happy and thankful that they even give thanks to their god before their meals. How can anyone not be moved at the sight of this?

While it is important for us to keep on progressing in this fast paced world and learn how to express our individual self, let us not be overly individualistic that we forgot to be concerned about the less fortunate ones in our society.